Petaling Jaya (The Star/ANN) - The
plight of single fathers is less known to most people but recent incidents
involving neglected children have brought into focus the pressures faced by
these men who are trying to make ends meet while bringing up their children.
Living in cities without the
benefit of extended families, cases of single fathers failing to cope with the
burden of parenthood are increasing.
The MCA Public Services and
Complaints Department says it has been receiving reports of such cases,
particularly from men who married "mail-order" brides.
"There are relatively few
Malaysian women who would leave their children behind when they walk away from
a marriage," department chief Datuk Michael Chong said.
"But their number has
nonetheless increased. The double whammy of having to fend for children on
their own while dealing with the emotional baggage can become the tipping point
for some men," said Chong.
He was referring to an incident
in Penang where a father had chained his daughter and son in the bathroom
before leaving for work. The siblings, aged six and two, were rescued by the
police last week after neighbours heard their cries.
Neighbours and a family member
have since spoken in defence of the single father, describing him as "a
good father who has never hurt his children".
The man was said to have been
under duress since his Thai wife left him in November.
Several men with grown-up
children recalled the great difficulties they had to face in adjusting to life
as a single parent.
Freelance technology journalist
A. Asohan, 49, said his wife left him and their two children five years ago.
"Previously, we could send
the kids for violin, Mandarin and swimming classes. Now, I can only afford to
send them to tuition and music classes," he said. "I may even have to
reconsider the music lessons this year," he said of his children, who are
now in their teens.
Asohan, who considered himself
lucky for "being able to put food on the table", said he had never
known of any case in which women paid alimony to their husbands despite
situations of equal wage.
Another single father said that
the top factor in bringing up a child on your own was cost of living.
"Men, too, worry about how
to make ends meet," said 41-year-old divorcee Low Swee Siong, who was
granted full-time interim access to his daughter Bi-Anne in a highly-publicised
custody battle in the Court of Appeal last year.
For retired teacher Chan Yat
Wah, 61, his life took a sharp turn when his wife died in 1998, leaving him
with two young sons to bring up on his own.
"I had to juggle a
part-time job to supplement my income, but I was lucky that my mother and
in-laws helped to take care of my sons whenever I was away," said Chan.
Sales executive Yuen Hoong Kin,
who has a teenage daughter, accepts the financial burden as part of parenthood.
"Getting the means to
survive is part of life and it is our responsibility as a father, even if it is
difficult to bear."
Educationist Dr Hartini
Zainuddin said there was a lack of affordable day-care centres to help
low-income earners who did not have relatives to fall back on.
"With limited financial
capability, parents do not know where to send their children when they juggle
between two and three jobs.
Lee Yen Mun and Regina Lee in
Petaling Jaya/The Star | ANN
Business & Investment Opportunities
YourVietnamExpert is a division of Saigon Business Corporation Pte Ltd, Incorporated in Singapore since 1994. As Your Business Companion, we propose a range of services in Consulting, Investment and Management, focusing three main economic sectors: International PR; Healthcare & Wellness;and Tourism & Hospitality. We also propose Higher Education, as a bridge between educational structures and industries, by supporting international programs. Sign up with twitter to get news updates with @SaigonBusinessC. Thanks.
No comments:
Post a Comment