Jan 4, 2012

Malaysia - Single parents need more help



Kuala Lumpur (The Star/ANN) - The stories are heart-wrenching and dramatic.

Two children, aged two and six, are shackled in the bathroom while their father goes off to work. A starving six-year-old girl, with bruises on her back, cries in anguish for six hours before neighbours come to her rescue.

These two recent cases in Penang may bring tears to our eyes and forment anger in our hearts but we must not be quick to condemn or rush to judgment.

Are these clear-cut cases of child abuse or do they reflect the bigger issue of how some segments of our society may have grown desperate in their struggle to work and care for their children?

The typical Malaysian family has changed through the years.
Gone are the days when we had huge families which resulted in an extended family support system that was simply priceless.

The family support system is not so readily available because relatives and friends are not always able to help out, especially if they do not live nearby or if they are in the workforce themselves.

One just has to look at the demographics in the Klang Valley and the annual exodus home during the festive occasions to conclude that the children who grow up in Kuala Lumpur see more of the domestic helper than their grandparents, uncles and aunts.

Studies have shown that economic development, modernisation, and rural-urban migration together have altered family ties and contributed to a more fragmented family structure.

This is further compounded by the corresponding steady and noticeable decline in the average size of the family in Malaysia over the same period.

Malaysia, like many developing and even the developed countries, is not alone in having to deal with the issue of childcare.

Today, with both parents at work, non-parental childcare options have not only become a necessity, but have resulted in a booming business.

Whether we have domestic helpers at home, or we send our children to daycare centres, the costs involved can take up a large chunk of the family budget.

It is not easy to find good care with persons other than relatives, and the cost can be too high, especially for families with low incomes.

Under such circumstances, children left home alone may be more prevalent than we care to admit.

With the growing cost of living, the option to exit from the workforce and being the caregiver is simply not an option.

Some have lobbied for crches in the workplace while some have asked for more flexibility in working hours.

But the reality is that in our relentless pursuit for growth and development, the "soft" issues will always be given lower priority.

Perhaps the time has come for us to compassionately provide for increased assistance to parents with childcare needs. Both the Government and private sector have to play their roles to target poor, single parents in the workforce.

While there are many active groups fighting for single mothers, we must also not forget single fathers.

The case in Penang of the two children shackled in the bathroom may not have happened if the father had had such assistance.

We are heading towards being a fully developed, high-income nation but our journey must not only result in us being materially well-off but emotionally impoverished.

And the care and nurturing of our children must rank high if what we work so hard for is to have any meaning for them and the future generations.

Editorial Desk in Kuala Lumpur/The Star | ANN



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